Portland Stories

Everyday's a holiday with you, Portlandia. You bring joy just by being you. This morning, for example, I went downtown and there was the Portland Marathon taking place. It is such an uplifting event, and it inspired me to train for it next year. I may as well; I don't have a lot else to do.

I can't even get my mother to call me. In the play, 'ART,' Yvan can at least get his mother to call him. How come as soon as people get to know me they don't want to spend any time with me? I must be really annoying. i'm not sure there is a lot I can do about that.

And the show goes on

A year and a half after POA let me go, I am still attending their events and providing social media for the company. Last weekend soured me though. The good thing that came out of it, two things: meeting Sasha Roiz, the handsome captain from Grimm, and spending the evening with Jeff and watching the game.

This weekend I am going back to ART. We'll see how it unfolds. Speriamo bene.

How fucking tragic

 I am looking at free stuff on craigslist. I am 53 years old. I have no savings, no house, no furniture, no partner, and no job. I am basically one of life's losers. Wow. I never thought this would happen to me.

Instead of being so horrified about my state, I could just think of myself as part of the downward shift, and therefore I will trend up when the economy trends up.

The D Girls

Daisy and Daria were much alike,had they chosen to admit it, but neither did. If you suffered a misfortune or downfall, they both would step up to offer help, voice concern. They loved animals, fine fabrics, and physical activity, though not one specific sport. It made sense, since they were sisters, that they would share characteristics. Even when Daisy and Daria reached middle age, though one had dark hair and the other blonde, though Daria was 5'9 and Daisy 5'5, people asked them if they were twins. As younger women they would smile, say no, and say isn't it odd you would ask that. Someone else asked me that just the other day.

Now that she is older, Daisy will sometimes simply answer yes, to Daria's tight-lipped smile. We are just sisters, not twins, she corrects in her don't-mind-my-whimsical-sister voice. She used to be fun.

3 months since my last post?$#! WTF!

I guess I have been busy or happy. Blogging inactivity comes from happiness, just one more reason to avoid the latter. Well, lots of things have happened in the intervening months, not a new job though, and that is really the main thing.  Month over month I go deeper into debt and look for creative ways to make ends meet until the next close call. I have got to get a job that pays a living wage!!!

My bad boyfriend

I have a kind of boyfriend. I don't know if he is incapable of being faithful or if he is just uninterested in me. Not completely uninterested; he does still have sex with me. He took my compost with him this morning, and that was nice. I just saw that he had reposted his personal ad: Vocabulary Lesson. Please. Yes sir. Thank you.

I am going to tease him with it. I will tell him that I want please, thank you, and sir to constitute a bigger part of my conversations with him. I have to be careful with my little game, though, because I do not want to get too drawn in emotionally that I can't detach when I need to. This is a Kieran kind of deal. I am being unhealthy, almost reveling in it by smoking cigarettes, avoiding exercise, drinking, not eating well.

More later.

L'ospitalita` all'italiana all'Opera.

This is a pleasant aspect of PDX Opera culture. Our GD is of Italian descent and really embraces the hospitable nature that is often attributed to central and southern Italians. As a result, we have a lot of functions that involve food and drink; or maybe it's just that we incorporate food and drink into so many functions.

I have mixed feelings about the commestibles at company events. I enjoy consuming them, but I dislike preparing and serving them. Guess who frequently prepares and serves at  opera  events?

How to remedy the role I play in an upwardly direction . . . I know the job I want, but I am not doing anything in a way that would recommend me for the position.

Back to the opera's hospitality. I really do attribute this to Cristo. He can be curt and dismissive, but he is also warm, generous, and welcoming. He likes to mingle with his employees at company parties. He espresses himself easily and humorously. When I first met him, he reminded me of Jon Stewart: the nose, the accent, the mannerisms. I really wanted to laugh, but I had the common sense not to.

He questioned my interest in the position I sought. I don't think I understood that "coordinator" basically meant secretary or assistant. Add to that my desperation to get a job with health insurance and a living wage, and the Artist Coordinator job looked like an oasis in the poverty desert.

Now that it is almost 2 years, I have got to change my position. I have to move up or move out. I just am not sure exactly how to go about it with the most chance of success. If I wait too long, the fact that I have a Ph.D. will mean very little. I could put together a plan for Peter. Propose to bring in 10 new camerata members in the first month. Speak to a bunch of organizations, write a bunch of grant applications,